Day 2 On my Own

So, I'm standing in my kitchen eating a steak for breakfast... and a crepe... and a banana... and some almond butter- basically snacking my way out the door. For lunch I have Taco Turkey Burgers with Guacamole and strawberries. I haven't been the greatest about diet the last two days. Emotional turmoil tends to do that, but I've decided to take all of the love that was rejected and turn it towards myself and the things that I feel passionate about... for the first time in quite some time without feeling guilty. I had an amazing night at the gym yesterday, I got home later than normal, and I haven't been doing my usual mornings at Gold's since... the 'end'... but I'll get back to it. I had to get to a place where I was okay before I could totally use up my energy. I got back up on the rings last night successfully until my last set, it's starting to feel natural, I just have to learn to string them together. I've stopped crying- that's a waste of my precious hydration- I need that water for training.. but honestly, I think I made peace with this a while ago, when I saw the end approaching. It still hurts to be rejected, but before it wasn't my choice. I've now made the choice to be on my own. Honestly, nothing has changed about how I live my day to day life, except now I'm not disappointed when my phone doesn't ring or ding. The phone calls and texts that I get cheer me up, they are uplifting... and I'm getting back to being myself. I hate to delay starting a "good routine" because of my OCD- I really want to say that April 25 will be the day that I start being 100% clean again... but I'm trying for today. I'm starting to food journal again and revisiting my Whole30 emails to keep me motivated. Competition is next week- I'll keep you posted :) *Stay fit and find YOUR happy*